Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Awake

It's late.
One of those nights where normal bed times are for
Normal people.
Restless as I am
I can feel that warm lover of dreams invading me like a ghost
Trying to stretch itself and reform to fit inside me.

Maybe I will lay and think of it for awhile
That thing that
Bothers me so much.
Maybe I will lay and think of it
Because it haunts me
Maybe I will lay and
Maybe I will

Maybe

No. I will not sleep yet.
A noise?
A thought?
A movement, a shadow,
A fucking guilty conscience?
NO.
That is not how I work.
Or is it?
What? Now I am going to doubt myself?
I don't do that either dammit.

Settle down.
Relax.
So you can sleep.
Calm, think calm.
Don't think, just sleep.
Don't think, just
Don't

Sleep.


Damn.
I'm never going to sleep.

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